Holy mother of everything that his holy. I swear to God sometimes this kinda dog poop really makes me wanna pull my hair out.

Starving, its 2 AM, I go to open a can of whatever the hell I happen to have in the cabinet. Ah Chef Boyardee, you never let me down when I’m in a crunch!

I pull out my can opener from the drawer and clamp down on the Chef’s dish. I begin to turn the handle with visions of small ravioli pillows about to dance in my mouth! Turn the handle again and …

The MOTHER F’er BREAKS!

Honestly this wouldn’t have got me steamed as normal, I mean yeah it sux, but this was only the second time I used the stupid thing.

Holding the broken remains of my can opener, and considering how I am going to open this thing with only a steak knife at my disposal, I start to feel my blood pressure elevate. I think to just how many I have bought over the two years here in San Antonio. The number really pissed me off!

5 Freaking Can Openers In 2 Years!

I mean honestly how the hell hard is it to make this thing? This was modern science back in 1810! Yeah dude, I Wikipedia’ed it here.

Yes I am a freaking dork for looking up “The History Of The Tin Can” on Wikipedia…

I have realized that each time I have had one of these break, I have been progressively getting a more and more expensive one thinking maybe I just got a crappy “cheap” one. Now I am up to almost 15 dollars for a stupid can opener. Does it really require this kinda cost to make something not suck? You wont find a can opener for less than 7 bucks, believe me I tried.

Which leads me to another tangent. How come when we get food for the poor we collect canned goods? I am sure you are going to say “cause it stays fresh.” Well no sh*t but think about it, if you are poor, you don’t have money and can’t buy a damn can opener! You are going to be like:

Thanks asshole for the food I can’t eat! Why not just give me a picture of some delicious food too while you are at it!

WTF you think he can use a rock to open that thing up? Give the poor guy a jar instead or something! Jebus! Is this some sorta conspiracy to balance donated food and resources? Donate food, make up the loss money with profit on the only freaking utensil that you can use to get said food out with!

Anyway, back to my plight. After spending an hour, yeah a freaking hour, looking at all the choices at Target for a replacement, I came across this little beauty:

There were any number of a thousand kinds and variety, but the kicker … none of them were “dishwasher safe!” This is another freaking annoyance I have to deal with. Why the hell do they still make kitchen stuff that cant be put in a dishwasher? I mean seriously! I can understand in the 80’s or the 50’s when no one had one, but I think you will be hard pressed nowadays to find a home without one. So the only one that is dishwasher safe also turns out to be designed by this designer who I am supposed to give a crap about.

Oh, how nice, its so pretty … WHO THE F CARES? Designer can openers? Puhleeze! Give me one that wont break for goodness sakes!

If this one breaks, I really don’t know what the hell I am going to do. I am just going to start going old school and use my Swiss Army Knife with the hook can opener.

The Swiss Army Knife is an example of quality which has not died … yet. I was reminded of the time my Father gave me one when I was in Boy Scouts about 20+ years ago. If I wasn’t afraid the TSA would steal it from me trying to bring it back in my checked luggage, I would have it on my person right now. I actually ordered this one:

from Amazon after buying two for my Father for Father’s Day. Buying them for my Father made me realize how much I needed one myself. So I spoiled myself and got the “gothic” model above. I keep this thing on me all the time. I had truly forgotten how great a tool it is. It has really saved my butt in quite a number of situations.

So I implore the manufacturers out there. Stop making things that SUCK. Take a note from Swiss Army (Victorinox)! You can make good quality tools and still make a profit. Stop scamming the little guy with your B.S please!

I had ordered these Lund “In-Channel Window Vents” from Amazon here (Lund 183573). I hate the ones that sit over the window weather stripping but these “in-channels” were the e-ticket baby. I was really apprehensive about getting them because there were no damn pictures of it on a 4 door Nissan Frontier 2007. The 2007 Nissan Frontier has two separate windows (one fixed and one you can roll up) in the rear door. I was afraid it would look stupid, but I took the chance and ordered them anyway thinking at the very least I could keep the front ones. Luckily they really set the truck off.

They were super simple to put on, no drilling and no cutting. You gotta first prime the inner channels where the window rolls up between two pieces of rubber at the top. You need to use the included alcohol pads and the abrasive sponge to make a point of contact for the 3M adhesive strips on the vents.

The front ones go on without a hitch and are relatively straight forward. You remove the red covering tape to expose the adhesive strips on the very front of the vent and the very back. Then you roll back about 2 inches at the two ends of the top strip. You push it up into the window channel and once its snug, you pull the red tape out and that makes the adhesive tape come on evenly. Then roll up the window which holds it against the rubber weather strip.

The back ones were a little strange. Everything is exactly the same as the above, but there is a very thin tab at the rear of the vents. The rest of it goes into the window channel as the front ones, but this little end tab needs to go between the metal pillar and the rubber weather stripping against it. So the sandwich on this tab is metal pillar, rubber weather stripping, window channel, window, rubber weather stripping. Kinda weird but it works and makes for a very good water tight seal that way. You’ll want to leave the windows up for like 24-48 hours so that the 3M adhesive has adequate time to set.

And THATS IT! Yeaup took me maybe 30-45 minutes cause I was being super OCD about it. Here are the results. A closeup from the front:

and here is a picture closeup of the rear:

I am all about conservative and stock look. Hate the gaudy, but these fit the lines of the truck just perfect I think. If you have a truck or SUV these are a must. They let you roll down the window about 1.5 inches without having to worry about the rain while driving. You can even leave em open to keep the car cool when parked. This is a damn necessity now that its starting to be summer here in Texas and those 110 degree temperatures start up.

Go pick yourself up a set, and again, if you have a 2007 Nissan Frontier SE Crew Cab (4 door), you’ll want Lund Model: 183573 “In-Channel Window Vent - 4 Piece” window vents.

So to the raving of everyone the MacBook Air is out. Pretty snazzy got to hold it and its crazy thin. Its not a perfect fit for me, but I can see this thing really taking off with a few tweaks in the future.

One of the most disappointing thing is the lack of the Kensington Security Slot so unless you are next to it 24/7 there is no way to lock this to a desk etc. For the price of it, I sure as hell aint leaving this alone. Luckily me and Kevin came up with a way to secure this with camouflage:

No one will be the wiser to suspect that there is actually a 3 thousand dollar laptop in that folder!

Ya I know everyone in the world puts the thing in manila envelope but not with camo labels!

Alright lame I know … I should have invested in manila folder production before the release of the MacBook Air, I prally could now then afford one!

You know I have seen some pretty stupid workout equipment in my life but this one takes the cake:

You got to be kidding me right? That is the most stupid thing I have ever seen in my life, The Hawaii Chair. Common people for the love of … Do you think this thing is going to make you look like Brad Pitt? Puhleeze. They should have called this the Retard Chair because you have to be an idiot to buy it.

You know, I am not a fan of Ellen, but this was actually quite funny:

and shows some real life use of this chair and how just insane it is.

You know by now my love for Sam’s Club. You find the most random stuff there you didn’t think you needed. Then in the parking-lot your like, WTF I spent 300 bucks on all this crap.

Oh well, one of those, impulse buys, was this 6 pack of dust remover. I didn’t go in with the intention of buying it, but I couldn’t resist it at such a low price … 3 bucks!

After spending about 3 hours in the place, I haul my covered wagon of crap to the checkout counter. Well when this stuff gets through the register, BEEP!!!! An alert pops up stating to check my ID. Apparently you have to be 21 to buy this stuff! Really?

The checkout lady said that its cause kids are huffing it to get high. I forgot, in this country, we make laws to protect stupid people instead of encouraging common sense. I think its pure Darwinism that someone huffing this shit shouldn’t progress those genes to the next generation. I mean whats next? Are you going to have to be 21 to buy a bag? Cause I am sure I heard people getting high suffocating off that.

Come to think about it, if you are old enough to drive, 16 years old, and you buy gas, who the fuck keeps you from huffing that shit? I guess they didn’t think of that one. I think by doing this, Sam’s actually opens up themselves to lawsuits. After all, if they have now the provisioning to check ID for this crap, that means they take the responsibility that this will not go into the wrong hands.

Well what ticked me off is that I got carded in the first place. I guess I look sketchy, and this item just didn’t match everything else I bought. You know, 72 vitamin waters, 5 gallons of mayonnaise, and a 6 pack of Dust Remover. That sounds like the ingredients you’d buy for a great weekend actually!