Ya know what? I’m bored. I think I’m going to go fight some crime. I have seen enough cartoons as a kid to be a fricken expert. Okay how does it go? From the 80’s I remember it takes a flashy computerized car … check! A utility belt, hmm okay yeah check! Cool retro 80’s theme song. Alright, now I just need like an origin story.

*ring, ring*, hello? Yes? Its me? … You say from now on, like my parents were, I’m the secret force of pole position! Get outta town.

No wait thats not cool enough. How about we add a mask, cause like I gotta keep my secret identity … um secret.

Wait hold up, “Masked crusaders working over time fighting crime; fighting crime?” Yo man funk that, I ain’t working over time, this is like a part time thing okay. I got a full time job dude. Oh well, I guess I aint fighting crime, its like too much of a commitment. Besides all this research has made me angry. OH SHIT, I think I am STRUNKING OUT !!! … YOU WON’T LIKE ME WHEN I AM ANGRY!!!!

Okay I guess we gotta tone down the violence and anger. Dude I got it, add a Sun Sword, Ookla the Mok, Princess Ariel, super-science, and sorcery and we got:

OH NO I am too late! The events here were to start in 1994, DAMN! See thats what happens when you procrastinate. Ah screw it, I’m going to bed.